i need all the luck i can get!

too many things going on, and i'm getting sick of everything that is killing us at such a fast pace.

1 final quiz, 1 final report, 2 interviews tmr. honestly, i rather focus on the internship interviews because those are the ones that will make me REALLY happy if i manage to grab hold of either one of the opportunity (much higher utility in the short run). but my final quiz is also scary. i've been doing well for IA for the whole semester, and i seriously dun want to screw up at the last moment.

these thoughts aside, at least my efforts in applying for internships are paying off. i might not be able to get the internships (cos well, my main obstacle is ALWAYS the interview), but at least i'm given the chance now. if i had gone for the interview and got rejected, at least i won't feel so inferior. there are just too many companies that are not getting back to me that are making me feel SOOOO bad about myself.

less than 4 days to the end of the craziness. i seriously hope these 4 days will go on smoothly.

i've also been feeling rather good these days cos i've been driving around. made myself overcome all the fears, and injecting confidence of my driving to my mum who's the deciding factor whether i can start driving out myself. well 2 1/2 years after getting my license, it does seem that my learning curve is too flat, but i'm feeling happy that i'm overcoming my fears and also less guilty about wasting money on the driving lessons a few years back.

and yes perhaps i'm really more suitable to be single, and i'm speaking objectively. there are too many things that i've been thinking about, and maybe it's just that i will never be able to find someone who's totally appreciative of who i am just because i have so many flaws that i cannot overcome on my own. i can feel bad for myself all the time, but nobody else is gonna take pity on me because of that.

i should learn to be more appreciative of the people around me instead.

i was just reminded of this phrase, "没有什么事能够让你怀疑你自己". perhaps i should just have more confidence in myself, and not keep focusing on what i can't do, but rather what i can. i'm so used to doubting myself that self-confidence seems like an unattainable task for me.