cny is (almost) here...

please practise what you preach before you even start preaching to me. i'd greatly appreciate that. thank you.

my week was so-so, and hence the lack of content for a post. i could perhaps do it in numbered form.

1) subjects taught for tuition are now reduced to the 3 sciences, which make it a lot less stressful i guess. do hope xiuwen will be fine with dylan actually. can't deny my tutee is an absolutely irritating boy. for one, he didn't do my work after one month. second reason being he forgot there was tuition cos his mum went m'sia. third reason and the worst, was that he kept falling asleep right in front of me during tuition. ended up having to lecture him.-_-

2) played 4 hours of squash with luther, nicholas and daryk after not playing since i graduated from jc. reminded me of the good old days seriously, playing squash with 6h after school at some staircase landing. i'm ever so lousy at it - got thrashed quite badly. but i had a lot of fun while at it! and plus the feeling of exercising after a long time of not doing so.

3) parents' anniversary dinner. it was my parents' 25th year of marriage on thursday! you know, sometimes i wonder how my parents were able to stay together for so long. there must have been loads of giving in and compromising, and of cos, resignation to fate. but well, i guess at least i'm lucky enough to have a reasonable standard of living thus far. i just blame myself for taking after my dad in terms of character.

4) was in bus 5 standing right in front due to the crowd when i saw a familiar blue bmw cut the bus's lane. and after some checking out of the driver, i realised it was yowie! it was really so coincidental, to see him drive along PIE, and the bus driver horned at him somemore. HAHA. really hilarious sight i must say.=P

5) most of the people around me got what they want for exchange! happy for them! ok lar except for ja and marcus.=X sorta made me think about going for exchange again, after putting the idea aside last sem cos of my inability to secure a scholarship. well as much as my parents said we prob could afford it, somehow i dun feel secure going, esp with my dad threatening to resign anytime. there are so many implications of going for sep, two of the major ones being:
- we'll be even more financially-burdened due to the high cost
- with my family members' healths deteriorating, how will i feel safe going?

sigh...i hate to make such decisions. but of cos even if i want to, i might not get the chance to cos well i have no idea if there's going to be a second round, and even if there is, the vacancies in the better schools are probably snapped up by now.=X shall wait for another email blast then.

cny is SOOO near now. somehow i dun feel the festive season, especially for this year. maybe cos i haven't even cleared the mess in my room, haven't thought of what to wear for the first day, etc. it's so tragic that as we grow older, such occasions become just a routine and not a joy. and with my bro and i not even close to our cousins, aunties and uncles, cny is just a matter of showing face.

AND we even have bizcomm stuff due on cny. wow. at least i kinda like my bizcomm group. we can talk quite a lot of rubbish! heh.

i hate myself for thinking so much. why can't i just simplify every single damn thing and not think about things that will make me even more miserable. it's just that somehow every indication is pointing in the exact opposite direction of where i want it to point. nvm if you dun understand this part, it's not meant to be understood.

my suspicion is once again confirmed. everyone has moved on, when will i?